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One question that never starts fights

By Patrick Whiteley
Updated: 2007-01-24 10:23


Chi fan le ma (have you eaten?) is what many Chinese ask after saying ni
hao and is one of the most civilized and meaningful small-talk topics
ever developed. Opinions about food, no matter who you are, are always
interesting and they never start fights.

Money, religion and politics have long been taboo topics of conversation
in many circles of society because they are considered too personal and
often cause division. Boasting about your appreciating property value is
not appreciated by renters and pontificating about a particular political
viewpoint can polarize a party.

In 2007, money, religion and politics are probably the most talked about
subjects on the World Wide Web and are not ignored in China by a long
shot.

I'm often asked: "How much do you make?" and it halts me in my tracks. I
don't feel comfortable about sharing my gross monthly worth so I used to
make up a figure, which was high enough to be realistic for a foreigner.
My lie never worked.

My alleged salary was always dismissed with a "Bu shi (no way). You get
more than that!" I now shrug my shoulders and jokingly answer: "Never
enough."

This quip seems to be the universally accepted answer for all workers,
even the super rich like me, ha. US billionaire JD Rockefeller was once
asked how much was enough. His response: A little bit more.

Chinese often ask about my religion. My friend Qing Ma says all
foreigners are Christians, aren't they? In the West, when someone probes
about religion, it's often the lead-up to an ear bashing. The inquisitor
only wants to know my viewpoint on God, the universe and everything, so
they can tell me how I've got it wrong. What they don't understand is
their opinion about me is none of my business.

My Chinese friends who ask about spirituality really don't care what I
believe. They are just curious. According to them, everything is
everybody's business.

I tell them my philosophy. Love many, trust few and paddle your own canoe.

"But what's a canoe?" they ask.

Politics? Some people are Left wing and others are Right wing. I am more
of a chilli chicken wing guy myself, which leads me to my favorite
talking point. Have you eaten yet?

Food, glorious food. I love chewing the fat on this tasty topic. When I
first started working in a Chinese office, I really wanted to know what
everybody was talking about besides work. Last night's TV show? Juicy
gossip about Gong Li? Maybe Yao Ming's last NBL game? I later discovered
they were talking mostly about food. How long do you marinate an egg
plant? The correct salt measure for boiling rice? And have you eaten yet?

The expression chi fan le ma, is very easy to remember, if you use my
little trick. Remember that really catchy Seasame Street song Manamana?

The only words are ma na ma na du du de du-du. Replace ma na ma na with
chi fan le ma, and you'll always have something interesting in Chinese to
say. Chi fan le ma du du de du-du.

I'm going to pitch my song to the Olympic Games organizers. What a great
anthem for the opening ceremony, with Gong Li and Yao Ming leading the
parade!

On that note, I've got to go. My chilli chicken wings are getting cold.


(China Daily 01/24/2007 page20)











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